KICK - MOVIE REVIEW

There are certain events, which after a point of time lose their significance but keep on occurring every year simply because they'd once taken place. 

A particular event to which I am referring to in this particular article is more fondly called the Salman Khan phenomenon, which usually strikes the nation during the festivities of Eid and turns out to be a good money spinner for those involved in film trade. 
{This phenomenon once occurred this year during January (JAI HO) but that wasn't the time when people celebrated Eid and hence its impact was substantially mild.}

So Kick is a debut affair for the popular producer turned director Sajid Nadiadwala and as is the case with most of the directors directing films which are made keeping in mind the first weekend collections and not the screenplay, it turns out that he virtually had nothing to direct.

Anyway Salman Khan is a tough actor to direct simply because-

**BHAI KI FILM ME BHAI KO KOI DIRECT NAHI KARTA!!**

Once again a popular film from down South is reworked to suit the taste of SALMAN'S audiences and this time around the rework and the screenplay have been contributed by none other than the intellectual genius of a celebrated author Chetan Bhagat. 
And boy does Bhagat surprise us!

Just wait for the last scene to unfold in Kick and trust me those of you waiting for Chetan Bhagat's upcoming book would be in for a rude shock!

Time to look back at investment banking Mr. Bhagat. 

Rajat Arora, the brilliance of whose screenwriting gave us films like Taxi No. 9211, Once Upon A Time in Mumbai and The Dirty Picture seems to have given up his control over writing fluid sequences and dramatic dialogues.

**YE FILM NA DIL ME AAYI, NA SAMAJH ME!!**

Alright coming to the point, KICK is not at all entertaining. 

The humour falls flat. Salman isn't half as endearing as he was in Dabangg. The songs induce headache. If only Jacqueline could act. 
If only Nawaz did not overact. 

Nawazuddin Siddique has been a reason to watch many films, sadly not KICK. There is no character build-up. He appears in a very random scene and it is then made "obvious" that he has evil intentions. 
His evil laugh is nothing but funny and everytime he tried to spill out a dialogue; I could not hide my expectations of him hurling a GOW style abuse at Salman. 
It is time we should try to look for villains that at least look their part if not act. 

Jacqueline Fernandez looks ravishing but that's about it. 
She is amazing at her dance moves and laughable at her acting stints. 

Randeep Hooda is convincing in his role that turns out to be similar to Abhishek Bachchan's in the Dhoom series. Randeep Hooda is wasted.
 I say this because he was the one who at least tried to infuse some blood in the otherwise insipid hooliganism but as was expected, wasn't given enough screen time to justify his role.

Salman Khan hasn't acted at all. He is Salman Khan in the film. And that for you folks is a brilliant display of NATURAL ACTING.

Characterization and role briefing seems to have stopped ever since Salman Khan did Dabangg. Since it is his film, he can do anything, and he will, the character be damned. 

So in one fine intellectual moment that might have happened during the screen-play testing, the makers play a master stroke by finding the name for the alternate identity of Salman and hence Devi Lal turns Devil. Amazing!!

The mask also comes in handy!

And to those hailing it as an action masterpiece, please stand up and describe one stunt that made you go OH MY GOD!

Dear makers- Don't try to bore us with Range Rovers and Double Decker buses bashing into each other. Rohit Shetty does that and much more with Mahindra Scorpio with much élan. 

The much talked about scene where Salman walks past a train as he pushes his cycle out of his sight is laughable; simply because he had been shot seconds before he does that. And still such TASHAN!?

Not that my review is going to make sense to the people who will still watch it and the stuff that Salman will release next year during Eid but I hope this at least makes the fan urge their Hero to do better films in the future. Trust me it feels miserable to spend more than INR250 on such stupidness. 

**4 KILO TAMATAR AA JAATE HAI 250 rupees me!!**

We love watching you Salman. It feels good to see the nonsense you do on screen but there is a limit to it. 
Try and understand that majority of your audience "saves" up to watch you on screen and then being subjected to such inglorious films is like cheating your fans!

Dabangg remains my favourite of all Salman's potboilers simply because it had a story to tell, a character to be portrayed along with the masalas! Come up with something like that. 200 crores is a bare minimum guaranteed anyway!

I am not an ardent admirer of artistic cinema but the commercial cinema these days is hardly entertaining. Kick is a straight Kick to your purses. Enjoy seeing your hard earned money fly away! 

KICK-E-KICKK!! (That is how the background score goes.)

**1.5 STARS**